Saturday, September 5, 2009

Line's: Last Season's vs. Next Season's

Let's take a look at last season's lines vs. this season's lines:

Marleau-Thornton-Setoguchi
Michalek-Pavelski-Clowe
Moen-Mitchell-Cheechoo
Roenick-Goc-Grier

Vlasic-Blake
Boyle-Lukowich
Murray-Ehrhoff

Nabokov-Boucher
*(One of the various lineups put out there)

Sooooo those lines are nice, but what are they for this season's so far? (for the offseason at least):

Marleau-Thronton-Setoguchi
Michalek-Pavelski-Clowe
McGinn-Mitchell-Cheechoo
Shelly-Nichol-Staubitz

Vlasic-Blake
Boyle-Huskins
Murray-Joslin

Nabokov-Greiss

(Or something along those lines)

Those lines suck. They are no where near close to last season's team. The only good one is the fourth one with that tough "sandpaper." Doug Wilson's right, this team needs to be blown up. My proposal? It's definably a good one.

It's along the lines of Roster-Rape you could say. It's still definitely better than that weak-sauce Rosterbation... Okay here is what the Sharks need to do:
  1. Trade Joe Thornotn for Daniel Carcillo.
  2. Trade Patrick Marleau for Jarod Boll
  3. Trade Devin Setoguchi for George Parros. Ew nevermind scratch that Parros is gross. Trade Seto for Riley Cote.
  4. Trade Michalek, Pavelski, Clowe, McGinn, Mitchell, and Cheechoo for Eric Godard, Zach Stortini, David Clarkson, Krys Brach, Mike Brown, Tim Jackman. (Make this a multi-team trade. A REALLY multi-team trade. It may be complicated but it sure makes things easy for me...)
  5. Trade Vlasic, Blake, Ehrhoff (oops), Boyle, Huskins, Joslin, and Murray for Cam Janssen, Colton Orr, Aaron Asham, Ian Laperriere, Shawn Thornton, and Eric Boulton. (again same case as above)
  6. Trade Nabby and Greiss for B.J. Crombeen and Brandon Prust. (see above again!)
So when you see these lines the first thing you think of is "WTF?" You might want to make an argument but you're to stunned by the stupidity. Except it's not stupid and I'll tell you exactly why.

You may wonder why I chose to trade for those players. Here's why. They were top 17 players leading the league in fighting majors. With those 17 players they had a grand total of 327 fighting majors. Wow.

How would this work? The Sharks would move away from the traditional three forwards, two defenseman, and one goaltender. Who needs a goaltender? Not this team. They will move to six kick-ass skaters on the ice. Remember the Broad Street Bullies? Yeah they were tough but they scored their own goals. This "new" Sharks team won't need to do this. They'll just scare the crap out of the other team. Imagine that. They will make the other team so scared, they will be forced to shoot the puck in their own net. That my friends would be amazing.

This brings us to my proposed lines the Sharks should use. 20

Carcillo-Jarod-Cote-Godard-Stortini-Clarkson
Brach-Brown-Jackman-
Janssen-Orr-Asham
Laperriere-Thornton-Boulton-Crombeen-Prust-Shelley
Nichol-Staubitz

(Nichol and Staubitz will have limited minutes, but they will be in-game injury replacements.)

Wow this is amazing. I bet I caught you off guard with my title of "Line's: Last Season's vs. Next Season's." Bet you thought this would contain useful analysis. Actually it does. One day some hockey team needs to try this method. I'm pretty sure it'd work and I'm 100% it would be entertaining.

This will probably never happen, but it should!

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