Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Rob Blake = New Captain of the San Jose Sharks

My thoughts on this:

Meh.
If the coaching staff and the players think Rob Blake would be the best captain, he probably is.

Also explanation on why it's okay if Blakey only captains (captain is a verb right?) the team for a year:

Pretend the Sharks are Pirates (not the baseball team, that would be horrid) and need to fight people. They then pick Rob Blake as leader (aka captain) because he is the most experienced. He’s a good leader because he’s been there before and knows what to do. The next year comes and Rob Blake sadly dies in battle. The Sharks will pick a new Captain and he will learn how to lead based on Blake’s example.

Monday, September 21, 2009

FJM'ing Jay Feaster

(Originally FanPosted at Fear the Fin... by me.)

Woohoo idunno723 attempts does another Fire Joe Morgan like FanPost!




Background on Fire Joe Morgan (by me of course):


I don't know if you guys are familiar with this blog called Fire Joe Morgan.. They were brilliant. Every terrible baseball article, they ripped them. It was fantastic. Sadly their blog ended but when I'm bored I still read old posts because they're awesome.


Recently FJM came back and made some articles on Deadspin and that got me all riled up. I am now inspired to try to make a FJM-like post. Thankfully Jay Feaster wrote this article.

*****

Jay Feaster's Blog: Trading for Heatley a mistake by San Jose

ZOMG PLAYOFF CHOKER!!11!!!1111

While it is still early, Bryan Murray is my front-runner for executive of the year honors this season. Murray took one very sour lemon and parlayed it into two refreshing glasses of lemonade by moving self-centered Dany Heatley to San Jose for solid NHLers Jonathan Cheechoo and Milan Michalek. The trade itself may not go down as one that rocked the sport, but, given the circumstances, Murray clearly pulled a rabbit from his hat and helped his hockey team in the process.

Bryan Murray is a genius. He got an aging right-winger in Jonathan Cheechoo and a I'm-never-going-to-reach-my-potential Milan Michalek. Bryan Murray wasn't even able to get a first round draft pick out of that deal.

Historically, I have been a Doug Wilson fan. He seemed to understand the importance of chemistry and the need to acquire players who value the crest on the front of their sweater more than the name on the back. Last year’s acquisition of Stanley Cup champion Dan Boyle from the Lightening was such a move. No one is more committed to the "team concept" than Dan. While the Sharks crashed and burned again in the first round last season, I believed they had started to turn a corner.

Dan Boyle is terrible. I think that's why he's a front-runner for the captaincy this year.

The acquisition of Heatley makes me rethink the future in San Jose. Wilson looks more like a mad scientist running about the lab tossing chemicals into the beaker with little regard to their compatibility, or combustibility, for that matter. Oh, Doug said the Sharks did their homework - and then some - before acquiring Heatley. Really?

Yep, that's right. Doug Wilson is friggin' crazy. 50 goal scorer who the hell want's that! Not to mention he'll be playing with Joe Thornton... PLAYOFF CHOKERS UNITE!!111!!!!!!11111

For a group that appears to need more leadership, grit and mental toughness, how is Heatley the answer? After signing a new long-term contract in Ottawa, (five years left, $7.5-million cap hit per season) Heatley decided he wanted out because he was unhappy with his "reduced role" under new head coach Cory Clouston. Imagine, a head coach with the courage of his convictions.

Dany Heatley with Joe Thornton...

What a shock to find a coach who believes that players, even superstar players who have scored 50 goals twice, must "earn" their ice time! Blasphemy! Second power play unit, reduced ice time, all designed not to keep Dany happy, but to help the team win more hockey games! Shocking!

............

If Sharks head coach Todd McLellan knows what is good for him he had better name Heatley captain of the team right now. What better way to keep Dany happy and show him he is loved? McLellan has already indicated he thinks he will place Heatley with ‘Jumbo’ Joe Thornton and Devin Setoguchi on the top line. Stop the presses! Did he have a choice?

Dany Heatley had a NTC. If he wanted to go to San Jose he would have waived it. Oh yeah never mind I forgot. He never wanted to go to San Jose... that's why he waived it!


What if he put Heatley with lesser lights such as Patrick Marleau and Ryan Clowe? Would the snub be enough for Dany to want out? Think Heatley will be on McLellan’s No. 1 power play unit? Is there any other option? (Because Heatley’s no-movement clause remains in full force in San Jose, he remains in control.)

Yeah, tell me again why Todd would do that? Why would Heatley not be on the No. 1 power play unit? It's not like he's a goal-scorer... wait....

McLellan’s job is no longer worrying about the group of players known as the Sharks. It is about the care and feeding of me-first Dany Heatley. Good luck, Todd. When the inmates run the asylum it’s usually the head coach who pays the price.

Yup. Dany Heatley already played in 1 preseason game... LOCKER ROOM CANCER HELLOOOOO!


Now burn me about my post.

Teal and White Photographs

At the Teal and White game you could sit wherever you want. My sister and I got there a few minutes after the doors opened and we rushed to the glass. It was my first time sitting there. It was cool to see the action up close. There were a few hits by our seats, and um it was a little bit scary. Anyway I got a ton of cool pics

Img2963x_medium

Um, I just thought this was a cool picture. Depth of field! Okay real hockey pics...

Img2991_medium

Kent Huskins

Img2997m_medium

Frazier McLaren is a ghost. It was really cool to see him play.

Img3000fv_medium

Tyson Sexsmith was being really immature. They had to put him on timeout in the corner.

Img3038_medium

Dan Boyle

Img3042_medium

Steven Zalewski

Img3056_medium

National Anthem singer lady... who sang the National Anthem wrong... "silently gleaming..."

Img3060e_medium

Hockey stick outta nowhere!

Img3069l_medium

aw everyone's favorite Joe Pavelski

Img3074zd_medium

Joe vs. joe (The capital "J" represents Big Joe and the lowercase "j" represents Lil joe)

Img3090e_medium

Some jerk kept leaning forward the whole game.

Img3104z_medium

Joe Pavelski tells his hockey stick "Hold me"

Img3105d_medium

The hockey stick responds by promptly kissing Joe Pavelski

Img3107g_medium

Logan Couture sighting!

Img3134d_medium

Joe Pavelski scores in the shoot-out

Img3154s_medium

Brad Staubitz(!) scores in the shoot-out

Img3162j_medium

Nick Petrecki scores in the shoot-out

Img3163j_medium

Sharkie tells Sexy it's okay...


Tuesday, September 15, 2009

I have surpassed the 1,000 view mark. LET'S GO RIOT!!!

To the viewer of the 1000th view and to Mr. K of Fear the Fin, I present you, the almighty E-Five:

[Editor's note]: If you work linked here from somewhere else, please don't leave me, read here often...

[Update 1:17 pm]: Puck Daddy put the "Semenov to Nichol T-Shirt" as one of his links. I got so excited I punched the first person I saw in the face (sorry mom).

[Update 3:17 pm]: First new person who makes a comment get's an E-five!

Saturday, September 12, 2009

How to make a Alexei Semenov shirt turn into a Scott Nichol shirt.

Early in the off-season I ventured of to the Sharks store. In there I saw this wonderful T-shirt on clearance for 5 dollars. I thought, I MUST have it. So I got it. A few week later it was announced that Semenov would not be on the Sharks team any longer. This broke my heart. Then a few weeks later the Sharks signed Scott Nichol. Until recently I learned that Scott Nichol would be wearing #21, the same as Semenov. I rejoiced. Lookits what I did:




Man I got really good value for that T-shirt. Also at Teal and White I'm am going to try to get Nichol to sign it. That would be awesome.

Heatley traded to the Sharks. Really it's true this time.

blah blah blah, Milan Michalek and Jonathan Cheechoo are gone.

Friday, September 11, 2009

Meeting Devin Setoguchi

Yesterday I was able to meet Devin Setoguchi at the Sharks store. It was pretty cool. Although when I talked to him, his answers sounded automated. Here was our conversation:

Me: Hey
Devin Setoguchi: Hey hows it going?
Me: Pretty good, how about you?
DS: Great!
(it sort of sounded like Tony. you know the tiger.)
Me: So are you ready for hockey season?
DS: You know it.

Anyway here's what I got from Devin Setoguchi:

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Patrick Marleau gone

Patrick Marleau is going to LA.

I'M SPEECHLESS although you could look forward to another rambling post in the near future.

/winks even though a tear falls down my face.

UPDATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IT'S NOT TRUE IT'S NOT TRUE DID YOU HEAR ME? IT'S NOT TRUE IT'S NOT TRUE, WHYS THIS BOLD AND ITALICS!!!! I DON'T CARE IT'S NOT TRUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LET'S GO RIOT NOW!!!!!!!!!!

Saturday, September 5, 2009

Line's: Last Season's vs. Next Season's

Let's take a look at last season's lines vs. this season's lines:

Marleau-Thornton-Setoguchi
Michalek-Pavelski-Clowe
Moen-Mitchell-Cheechoo
Roenick-Goc-Grier

Vlasic-Blake
Boyle-Lukowich
Murray-Ehrhoff

Nabokov-Boucher
*(One of the various lineups put out there)

Sooooo those lines are nice, but what are they for this season's so far? (for the offseason at least):

Marleau-Thronton-Setoguchi
Michalek-Pavelski-Clowe
McGinn-Mitchell-Cheechoo
Shelly-Nichol-Staubitz

Vlasic-Blake
Boyle-Huskins
Murray-Joslin

Nabokov-Greiss

(Or something along those lines)

Those lines suck. They are no where near close to last season's team. The only good one is the fourth one with that tough "sandpaper." Doug Wilson's right, this team needs to be blown up. My proposal? It's definably a good one.

It's along the lines of Roster-Rape you could say. It's still definitely better than that weak-sauce Rosterbation... Okay here is what the Sharks need to do:
  1. Trade Joe Thornotn for Daniel Carcillo.
  2. Trade Patrick Marleau for Jarod Boll
  3. Trade Devin Setoguchi for George Parros. Ew nevermind scratch that Parros is gross. Trade Seto for Riley Cote.
  4. Trade Michalek, Pavelski, Clowe, McGinn, Mitchell, and Cheechoo for Eric Godard, Zach Stortini, David Clarkson, Krys Brach, Mike Brown, Tim Jackman. (Make this a multi-team trade. A REALLY multi-team trade. It may be complicated but it sure makes things easy for me...)
  5. Trade Vlasic, Blake, Ehrhoff (oops), Boyle, Huskins, Joslin, and Murray for Cam Janssen, Colton Orr, Aaron Asham, Ian Laperriere, Shawn Thornton, and Eric Boulton. (again same case as above)
  6. Trade Nabby and Greiss for B.J. Crombeen and Brandon Prust. (see above again!)
So when you see these lines the first thing you think of is "WTF?" You might want to make an argument but you're to stunned by the stupidity. Except it's not stupid and I'll tell you exactly why.

You may wonder why I chose to trade for those players. Here's why. They were top 17 players leading the league in fighting majors. With those 17 players they had a grand total of 327 fighting majors. Wow.

How would this work? The Sharks would move away from the traditional three forwards, two defenseman, and one goaltender. Who needs a goaltender? Not this team. They will move to six kick-ass skaters on the ice. Remember the Broad Street Bullies? Yeah they were tough but they scored their own goals. This "new" Sharks team won't need to do this. They'll just scare the crap out of the other team. Imagine that. They will make the other team so scared, they will be forced to shoot the puck in their own net. That my friends would be amazing.

This brings us to my proposed lines the Sharks should use. 20

Carcillo-Jarod-Cote-Godard-Stortini-Clarkson
Brach-Brown-Jackman-
Janssen-Orr-Asham
Laperriere-Thornton-Boulton-Crombeen-Prust-Shelley
Nichol-Staubitz

(Nichol and Staubitz will have limited minutes, but they will be in-game injury replacements.)

Wow this is amazing. I bet I caught you off guard with my title of "Line's: Last Season's vs. Next Season's." Bet you thought this would contain useful analysis. Actually it does. One day some hockey team needs to try this method. I'm pretty sure it'd work and I'm 100% it would be entertaining.

This will probably never happen, but it should!

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Woohoo!

Next week will be a Shark-tastic week.

September 7-9th Sharks rookies will battle Ducks rookies at Sharks Ice. Hopefully I'll be attending some of those. I already printed out the rookie roster to start memorizing names and numbers. Should be a very cool experience.

September 10th Devin Setoguchi will be at the Sharks store. That'll be awesome as well. I'm planning on having him sign my Devin Setoguchi rookie card.

September 11th will be interesting because I have been informed the Sharks will be making a move. (I am totally make this up btw. I just have to make it a full Shark-tastic week)

If you just noticed there have been a lack of posts lately... where have you been?! It's been like this all off-season. Can't wait for the season to start! Now please?